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Cow flakes

Hey!
Ones again Nobel Prize was given to some idiots. In my opinion awarding committee has shitted their pants and right after that incident the weather guy told that winter will be extremely cold. The prize in economics was awarded for the theory of contracts. In my opinion Nobel Prize in economics should be given to an old man who counted the number of teeth in his mouth and compared them with the number of gorillas teeth. All respectable people already know what is economics - 2+2=Potato. The economy is simple - buy a jar of milk, pour a little in your mouth and rinse it. after these cunning action spit the milk back into the jar, shake it and carry the jar back to the store. After that in the store, you should say that there were parrots feathers in your milk and they already stick out from your ass. Immediately demand money for treatment, or threaten that drunken bears will come and go ape shit on their store. That is the economic relationship between people. As you understand dear readers that this is complete idiocy, but this method has a right to life.

The cold times has begun it's time to set the fires on. I have no firewood, but there are a lot of sheep's wool. I get a lot of wool, which I burn in the chimney. At night, I climb into the sheep barn of a neighbors, (where the sheep live) and I shave them with a  Gillette Mac 3 razor. So I get the wool, that I put inside the chimney. If its getting to hot in the house, I pee on the chimney and after this ritual the steam appears, which envelopes the whole neighborhood. This fumes affect people like marijuana does and people walk around high. Don't think I'm not crazy, just always have to add more spiciness to the gray days. By the way - according to statistics every 30 seconds on the Earth one person is going crazy. According to this, while you are reading this article - someone is already standing naked on the roof and whistling to the sky, so that Quik the Bunny shall descent from the sky and share a cacao.

Recently got acquainted with the secret documents and realized that hurricanes are created by scientists in the laboratory. Example: the hurricane Ivan the Terrible created in the secret laboratory. The hurricane is created in a following way - reeking, high on pot, bearded biker picks up a cup and blows into it. This way a little hurricane is being born inside. Later the cup is being placed in the bag and thrown away to the landfill. Hurricane grows in size in the landfill and later on bums chased down it into the ocean. The mother-nature is very kind to man, and all natural disasters are created by people themselves. It is incredible and classified information, but someone's got to cover the events. Many things created in America.

Of course I can not ignore the elections in America. The elections were won by Donald trump - "hand of the Kremlin". Why is he called like that? After all, it's not true! President Putin doesn't wear a wig and is not a member of wig wearer's club. Of course it is not fashionable to discuss Trump's hair, but there is something wrong on top of his head. I would say that he has some tropical jungles on his head. But in my opinion he will be an excellent president, because he knows how to ride a Segway and how to not to fall away like it did Bush junior. People gossip that Hillary got a job in Burger King  and will work in the Trump's administration. She will lead potato and sausages quality. Oh well, the time will come and we will talk more about this topic. Hey party people by the way - don't be afraid to donate money on this website, there is no nothing to worry. All the money will go to the development of happiness! Also, subscribe to the RSS feed and find out about important events first!

P.S Soon, the site will resume selling unique things, only first I have to find them :D.

Thank you, follow up the news!

BALLS OF STEEL

As I always say - the political Worldwide tensions are sizzling hot. And it's not a dancing bear with a tambourine at the meadow - This is a full-scale conflict. At the present time there is an opposition between the great powers. To be honest I don't care who wins, I need a party right now. To be honest - I'm actually very worried about peace on Earth and so I vote for the Emperor of Afghanistan, who promised to plant the red poppy all over the World. Well, to be honest - I invented this story, I don't vote for the Emperor. There already was one emperor in the history, named Napoleon. He was playing cards on the strip and eventually he became completely naked. After a long stay in this form, he crawled into the bear's den and died there. Emperors have always been useless governors, they're dying off like flies, therefore all power should be transferred to farmers!

A human being should do useful things such as: dolphin rescuing (population), preventing whale murdering (and feed them), growing marijuana and others. Recently I slaughtered  all the crows in the park with a club, because gang of dirty crows flew from the local landfill, they smelled like slops (reeking like slops). By doing that, I chased them away from the park, so they couldn't rape old ladies anymore. After a while I heard someone screaming and saw a sheep which was sitting on a tree. I climbed a tree to save her, but a little bit later a fell down into a pit with a slipping bum, whom I got scared, took his pants off, which had Energizer batteries in the pocket. And I washed his butt to improve the odour. Okay, let's not talk about bad things and instead let's talk about the pokemon army.

Tell me please how many each one caught? I've caught two invaders and after that my phone suddenly started to vibrate and fell into a bucket with a horse dung. Since then, I stopped playing games and started to save money to invest in the business. So, the campaign is starts now, donate: 1000, 5000 or 10000 bucks and become a member of my elite club. Each member receives a club membership card, with which you can get a free entrance ticket to the circus and to the all parties of any club in Miami. All the money will go for the good deeds, also on purchase of english grammar book. I don't know how will you get inside the club with the member card, but I guarantee that you'll get this card. I need some money for business promotions, here's the thing.

Recently one friend told me about available vacancies at her working place. They needed a carpenter and tractor driver, but because my hands grow from ass - I didn't fit in for the job. I want to put on a Zorro mask and act heroically. By the way it will be Halloween soon and then Christmas. I think I will put on an inflatable butt on my head on Halloween. I'm not going to walk and talk "trick or treat", no, I will put it like this: either you give me money or I will break your neck like a twig. Most important thing is that holidays would passed with out an incident. Things are not calm in our city as well. I caught an elusive grandpa who threw feces at people. He missed me, because I have evaded and I shot him with a harpoon. The harpoon of course was not real, made from plastic for children. I'm always so glad when there is a new article on this site, because I can talk with you, my favorite readers. On this good note I will finish for today. If you have any wishes, suggestions or criticism you can write me a letter. If you want to support me, then, you can do it any time. Also you can send your gifts directly to the bank account if you wish.

Thank you for attention, follow up the news!


P.S My apologies about today news article being rough and aggressive. Next time the article will be much nicer and lighter.

Golden Age

Not long ago the Rio Olympics ended with a spectacular closing ceremony. At this point I was in the bathroom and washed a dirty horse, which ran away from the Gypsies and then she came to me. A little bit later I dressed her in the nightgown and locked her in the attic. After a while, the Gypsies attacked my house and I had to call the police (SWAT team had been notified too) and a helicopter to evacuate my rubber dolls. In this stressful time I ate half a kilo of garlic and all smoothed out, because garlic kills worms and also keeps evil spirits away.There were many controversies at the Olympic Games, the subject was - the use of performance-enhancing drugs. I also ate a green cucumber and felt like a champion, also I greased some black shoe polish around my heels -  so nobody won't find me in the dark and  I will run to the finish line first. Not long ago, to relieve stress I watched the movie "Titanic" with Leonardo DiCaprio. After watching the movie I cried a lot and was horribly wet, a little bit later I decided to destroy this tape with the movie. For a long time I couldn't come in a normal mental state. I had to take the crowbar and hit myself in the stomach. Only after this procedure I was relieved, but suddenly I started to become swollen.

Not long ago some scientist said that the earth is not round, most likely it is triangular, like his ass. The science of space exploration in general isn't developed yet! Mission to Mars will fail, because the astronaut always accidentally farts
and after that every time a bubble appears and the spaceship collides with an asteroid. Recently an astronaut from Zanzibar had pooped into an illuminator and the spaceship fell into a Black Hole. NASA didn't says about it, but respectable people should know all information. I really hate stupid news and stupid scientific discoveries of stupid scientists. No, of course there is a lot of cool scientists, who know how to remove the cellulite from the ass of a camel, but that's another story.
I like economic news where they say - that Africa is full of homeless people. I just say that this is not true, because I have called a hotline and donated 1 Euro for Africa's development. I also like Forbes Magazine, where they find the money of some people. They probably did not realize that the money can be stored in a grandmother's chest and all the money can't be counted -  as a chest buried in the desert and guarded by Indians.

Summer was so hot and that why I cut the watermelon and from the rind I made a hat. I haven't got to Rio Olympics, because I wasn't allowed to enter the plane in a black cloak. So I was going by a trade ship with wood cargo, which was arrested in Panama, because of drug trafficking. So I ended up stuck there for three month. Yes, I wear a black coat dressed on my naked body, but I am not an exbicionist. I don't like these awful perverts, but to be honest I like to walk in a black cloak dressed on my naked body. I never take off that black cloak in public places, I usually take it off in front of the bears in the wood. I make them scared so they do not steal bees' honey. Strange things are happening. A few days ago I turned on the washing machine and then I found a paralyzed squirrel inside. I gave her first aid and onions to eat. X-Files... I want to believe. Okay, honestly it was a mystification - I lied about the squirrel.

I studied to be a successful manager in the Institute and know about the streams. There is a main stream and a golf stream, fck. I'm confused, I mean cash streams, fck, cash flows! Remember, that this website is such a flow or a small brook.
Let the stream flow and the music of Michael Boyarsky play!

P.S Don't forget to play real games, do not forget to do good and help others.
 

Thank you, follow up the news and play.

Legendary Time

Hello party people!
For many years I'm telling you about pokemon and I reveal secrets - is there any life in the trash can. By the way, I never forgot that on this site there are a lot of business streams. Who came here for the first time or got out from the burning tank, you should know - you came here because of the love of naked penguins have brought you here. Rays of goodness sanctified you and God sent grace  through the transmitter, which this website is. Alright, let's not speak like fat priests, which receive the Holy spirit after they eat some chicken. I will not pull the cat's tail and, as I said above, this website helped me to carry on a thriving business. The business almost failed, because typhoon "Ivan the Terrible" raging for 10 years in my garden, which have destroyed all my potato. Selling of the unique things such as: wooden fork, cones of pine, box of matches filled with fresh air was slowed down too, because the wild bears snuck into my workshop and stole all my tools for craft. Also they shitted on a porch, it was necessary to clean everything with a shovel. To attract investment on this site I went on an unprecedented step. A couple of days ago, I started the game on the website. This is not a game where you have to chase the opponent and to shove him a brick in his ear, everything is much more serious. The game is called the dart, you take a dart and throw it. Know my dear friends that it's not an idiocy, it's just an epic session. You throw the Darts and get points. If you score a certain number of points, you can donate some money or big money to my cashbox. You can also donate a sum of money equal to the sum of your points. It's very simple, like chicken egg, don't worry

Now the World is in trouble! In the World there are a lot of money(so much money), even a hippopotamus at the zoo eats money instead of grass. And when he is pooping - the same money fall out from his ass. That's why the expression "dirty money" appeared. But not so bad, Mr. Proper will always come to help you. You have to hop on a broom and to think about how Moses wandered in the desert.No, it's a great mystery, better think how it's hard for Chupakabra to live in the forest. And this robber Proper will come in your house. He will tell you, that he came to wash your floor. Yes thats true, he will mop the floor, the floor will become very slippery. A little bit later you will slip and fall, you will lose consciousness.
While you will be unconscious, Proper will Rob your house. And that's the reason why the World is littered with money. I just want a little release him from such huge amounts and to direct them in another stream. Just look how we have strayed from the topic! The topic was about the great game, which was launched. Play Darts, invest in a website and never forget about mercy. And I promise that I will always please you and behave well. Know, that it's not so bad to show mercy and to invest money in my game or just to donate. And there is no shame to donate, let the others be ashamed, for instance the website - kickstarter. They gather large sums of money at their website for different projects and so you know, most of them are needless. Believe me.

The most important: when you play the game, don't fool me plz! Play fair and donate the cash from the heart. As time goes I will keep you updated, all the money will go to a handful of the good. Stop scratching the ears of rabbits, believe in me. Now I am on the crossroads, at the breaking point. Donate from the heart, And let mercy never leave you.
Thanks!
Follow up the news and play.
P.S. My english is improving by every news report.

Update

Dear my readers and members of the club!

Soon there will be the biggest update that ever was, real explosion! The update will be somewhere in May! Please be patience!
 
Thank you, follow up the news.
 

New seazon

As I said that in this news release will be a powerful turning point in IT, new strategy and website content update. But because of the crisis and the collapse of the currency markets I have become much poorer. I do not keep money in the bank, I kept them in my pants and in the three-liter jar. Not long time ago I made a fire to cook a meal and bought some sausages in the market. After I ate, I had a swollen stomach and I was very scared. I was scared that the food will go through my ears
and to save myself I started jumping over the fire. When I jumped over the fire I lost my pants in it. In the pocket of my pants was a check for a large sum of dollars, which
I found in the internet and printed out. These jumps were like a movie about Indians. Later on I realized that expiry date of sausages was over for more then two years ago. That's why I was so foggy, so now I eat only yogurt, which expiry date was over two month ago. I love to eat, I'm a gourmet. Be aware, if you put a bunch of dill inside of fish and add some honey - you will get a honey-fish. Of course to do so you should be an idiot or a stupid moron. Oh, Bon appetit!

You have already noticed, that a lot of refugees are coming to Europe! The next Halloween will be the most violent as never been. Refugees will knock at your door and will say - trick or treat! trick or treat! Of course the problem with the refugees must be solved. It is necessary to build skyscrapers, to set up water communications and confiscate all TV's in the countries where they live. The life in Europe is not so easy and there is no truth on TV. Who the fu!k is watching TV? Probably every homeless are watching to the electronic stores window. I often think how to solve the problem with homeless people. As you know, that one of the concepts of this website is - mercy. First of all wash them with a water hose and let them go to the
Ritz hotel to have a meal. But this is not an easy topic for discussion, and there are many nuances.

I recently watched a cartoon and heard that hunters want to trap Yetti aka Bigfoot and send him to the space. The goal is to hit an astronauts forehead. He will do this to prevent them to open the window
at the space station. You should know that when the window is open - you can feel an air flow. As one of the many concepts of this site - is to tell the truth, I will say that it is not true. It's a stupid joke of a drunken Santa Claus at the matinee in the kindergarten. You can't fool me! There are so many alcoholics and so much alcoholism in the whole World. We have to fight against the alcoholism by taken the alcohol away from them and drink theirs drinks quickly. But this is a very complex system, it is not yet fully modified by mе. At the moment of adding of this article I gathered all my thoughts together. I remembered that I am a novice financier and philanthropist. Recently I called the emergency crew and financed them to clean a bunch of a horse dung. In fact there was a gypsy camp passing in front of my house, with a herd of horses. Invest in good things from the open heart and this site will be an excellent platform for investment!

P.S Remember that you can invest not only in emergency crew!

Thank you, follow up the news!

Summer heat

Hi there!
I heard somewhere that breeding rabbits is a very profitable business. But this World is in trouble, the situation is getting worse every day - there is a clear confrontation (opposition) of the most powerful countries on the Planet. Which is reflected in the economic, political and military terms. The following information was obtained from reliable sources: politicians decide all their issues in the bath. The bathhouse is located somewhere in Africa in the Sahara desert. They are sitting under the hit in the strawhats and chewing a cactus with camels. By the way shaving cream Gillette actually was not invented for the face, in fact cream was invented for the ass. In order to make it easier to shove political cactus in that ass. Sorry for being rude, but it's true! Everything is turned upside down as the pan with porridge. All these global conspiracies made me lose the point about rabbits and there is no sense now to talk about them. Rabbits have been frightened by all this nightmare on the Earth, they are shaking and trembling now like a naked dwarves in the refrigerator. It will be difficult to breed them. If you breed shaking rabbits, they will deliver shaking babies, but they have to be born healthy.

Recently I wanted to open a Swiss Bank account, that later money flowed into my pocket. But I was advised not to open an account there. The old man on the street told me that there is some mountains, sheep, shepherds and nothing more. Apparently it was a former Bank depositor. I don't know of course, but I decided not to open my account there. Thinking about opening an account in a local Bank. It is necessary when your bank provides services to work with all e-currencies. It is very important for me, that managers do not ring me to propose their stupid stuff/services. For example, calling me to offer by mistake retirement of a veteran of Vietnam, or to take a loan in exchange for the boot (shoes). Global cash flow is very large, so I think it is time for the project of the century to join this thread (flow).

I think that project Potato and Nobel is a real breakthrough in the IT industry. If people are investing millions of dollars in Picasso's painting, then they can invest in this masterpiece website. Look at this website, there is nothing superfluous. On the top of the page you can see scales, which hold the entire World order. I think that the balance is broken, because disorder and spies are everywhere. By the way if you constantly read news here, you can find the gift of telekinesis inside yourself. You can move objects by force of will and quickly to hammer nails with your forehead. But better do not do it! Especially don't really try to hammer nails with your forehead. Usually, I cut the bread into small slices with the help of my forehead. But that's another story. And don't forget the concept of this site - to go in all serious.There will be something new in the next news letter, will be a tripping point in the industry!

Thank you for attention, follow up the news!

Sheeps

Hello!
In general, I've been selling potatoes on this site and many farmers were not satisfied. They wrote me an angry letter full of threats, and in the envelope was a horse's head. I got scared, because I thought that this letter was written by mafia.

Later, I have realized that it was a scarecrow and then I remembered that I have ordered this scarecrow in carnival shop. Also farmers wrote me that I keep my potatoes in the crapper, then I put them out and sell them. Thank them for the revelation, but it is not true. Actually I have donated all my potato supplies to starving people in Africa and decided not to sell it. My dear readers know, that I am selling only unique things such as - socks, boxes of matches e.t.c.

There are some drunks and other punks are hanging out near my house. Today I've  put on a horse's mask on my head and went to talk to them. They got very scared, they left all their crap and ran away to the bushes. I was with a chainsaw and I started to saw down an electric pole, which fell down on these bushes. This gang doesn't bother my neighborhood anymore. That's how I've  dealt with this gang. I'm called Hans Andresen quite often. Yes, but so what?. I'm a bit embellished this story.

Year of the Sheep is already and this project celebrates 4 years! Generally speaking, the project began its existence in 2008, but then my keyboard contained only two buttons. After a time, I have bought some more buttons and mastered computer. I loved my computer, I fed him with electricity and instead he faithfully worked for me.

In 2008, I decided to create an online store that will specialize in the sales of potato. First of all! Tell me, what idiot would buy potatoes in the Internet? Secondly! Anyone can dig out itself potatoes in the garden! Thirdly, at that time I wanted to set a price in the amount of $ 50,000 for one potato! I still have no doubt that this is a very cost-effective price. On earned money from the sales I  planned to buy a BMW (real pirate's car), and a lot of books to become smarter. And of course a part of money I planned to donate to charity or to the needs of churches. And finally, I wanted to buy a ticket to the circus and to go to look at the clowns.

I'll tell you honestly, once someone wrote me a letter (e-mail) - "Hello, I would like to buy some potatoes for 20 000 dollars!"* I was very happy, but my computer has burned because he was old. I lost a lot of data from my hard drive and I forgot the password to my e-mail box. I was very upset and I almost forgot my own name, but thank God nothing happened.

The concept of this site is to interact with people, But I think that Moses had already showed people the right path. If shorter, I wanted to crank out a profitable business on this site. The main idea was to sell more potatoes, but as I said above after a time, I changed my mind.

After a while I remembered that I had made a wooden Easter egg and later I decided to sell it. That is how the idea came - to sell unique items. «  How is the sale? » - you would ask me. « Crappy »  - my answer would be. Please tell me, who will buy an egg or pants with a hole? The sale almost has fallen, as I had a bad marketing. But I don't want to lie, I had a couple of offers.

So if you are interested in something, be sure to tell me. Let this online portal will be similar to the abode of the Hospitaller Order. To be honest, I don't even know who they are. Perhaps they are somehow connected with the Order of the Red Cross.

Remember, that life is colorful. And if you are tired to glue on the wall in your toilet million dollars, better unstick them and invest those papers in order of Nobel's Garden Engineers, this will be your piggy bank. Well, to be honest sometimes I'll break it to get money to buy bread. Of course then I'll glue it again.

If you are visiting this site for a long time, you know me well. And if not - then quickly read from the beginning. And remember that the correct monetary investment - will save up your nerves. And I'll do the rest. The better place is here, believe me.
In the near future I plan to open an account in a good bank for currency exchange with you. Cash flows - fair economy!

P.S * Dear customer, who wrote me an email! Write to me again!

Olympus

 

Hello!

I have heard the good news, soon there will be winter Olympiad 2014 in Sochi! There, everyone can ride a toboggan and jump with a parachute. I also know that in the winter you can go skiing and you can take a shotgun and shoot at the flying saucer. In winter you can do anything you want, for example - to ride a deer. But the fact is that, not all the deers want to be ridden, that's why you need to convince them. Sometimes these beasts have to fight with us, thus they are fighting for their rights. Of course I will support my favourite bowling team, which plans to win the nomination - ski jumping from a springboard. I'm sure they will win, the most important thing is the unity of the spirit! The games will be interesting, there will come some presidents, politicians, and others dudes. All these people are planning to go to a hockey game and make a parachute jump, they will make it, the most important thing is the unity of the spirit! Thieves, crooks, swindlers and other different morons are planning to arrive at the Games. They will do their evil deeds, and they will make it, the most important thing is the unity of the spirit! Defenders of the law will not sleep on the tree, they will catch this whole gang and they will make it, the most important thing is the unity of the spirit!

While I was writing the first paragraph - the Sochi Winter Olympics ended on a high note and Paralympics has begun! The Paralympics shows, how people with disabilities can unlimitedly grow and win. So appreciate what you have and do not complain to some problems, there is always a way out, and if it is not - then you have bumped into the wall. While I was writing last sentence - the Paralympics have ended and conflict in Ukraine have started. Passions boil, parties are struggling for power! Of course it's very difficult to find out what is realy happening in Ukraine, because there is an information war from different sides. Information is distorted and hard to learn the truth.

While I was writing the second paragraph strange things started happening in the World: the plane disappeared from the radar, crocodiles are leaving the river and attacking locals, military conflicts are everywhere, black guys are rapping, Queen of England has stained her crown with jelly and so on. My neighbor caresses a three-eyed cat, and says that this is all because of  nuclear testing, I don't agree. The problem is that on Earth there are a lot of sins and people forgot the Holy commandments, or simply do not observe them, they swimming in the bloody bath of sins. But damn! There are more and more money in the World! Who's fucking their prints? Show me this place!

But everything is not that bad, there are still good people in the World, they live in Jerusalem, and we can call them - Rastaman. I don't know is it true or not, but information is being checked. By the way Moon spins around the Earth, lunatics live there.
I'm not sure about this, but information is being checked. And as always, by tradition, at the end of the article - selling a box of matches, which was used by Napoleon. I'm not sure about this, but information is being checked.

Thank you, follow up the news!