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After winter coma

Dear hot mamas and pimp daddies, it's time to clean up huge amounts of shit after a hard winter, it was after last winter, durring which a combat panda, which escaped from a circus and raped an old grandpa from the Cocker's family.
The fact is that, he sat in the closet peeing into the laundry basket, because he was hiding from his wife, who loved role-playing in a BDSM costume, but old grandpa rather loved to hard core fuck vietnam war cripples from nursing home. I'm not a fan of violence, but I always love to watch videos when a nigga approaches to elderly asian women and roundhouse kicks her in the head. The services responsible were run off their feet searching for that malefactor. Once on the parking lot, this black dick decided to knock out a woman in a paranja, he approached her and she activated the belt of the martyr, and at that moment we lost the future NBA star. Actually I don't like when some cock suckers hurt women, better hammer those emo, dirty punks and lesbians. By the way, emo has disappeared for a long time, they have not been seen for a long time and in the meantime, the Gillette company has earned a lot of money for them. After all, the culture of emo is to cry and commit suicide, slit own wrists with a razor. At the beginning of the article, I began to talk about shit, and the topic slipped to the bottom, like the dollar rate. If you do not know how the dollar will react to my topic developments, then join the Taliban and build a wall on the border with Mexico. I wrote my proposal to the Washington Post newspaper to move the Great Chinese Wall to the border with Mexico in order to save money, but my proposal brutally brought down the yuan and Mao Ze Dong asked to bring him clean socks with Iron Maiden print on them. In fact, this idea was suggested to me by a friend of my grandmother's - the Emperor of Jamaica Abraham Rosenberg. The man who was just released from the mental institution, he wants to give you a drug overdose, then sick a metal rod into your head and put you naked into a rusty tank of water. Politics is a tricky business, it's hard to understand, who is a fag and who isn't. No fucking way you'll know who you are banging. Although everything is clear - Prince Charles fucks herd of sheep and spin the bottle with Elton John's husband. In one of the articles I mentioned Prince Charles, well, excuse me, Tony Blair, is his brother? Lets compare them .Tony Blair has such a facial expression, as if he had sucked Bush Jr.'s cock for 8 years, and Prince Charles's face is as if he had craped his pant two days ago and forgot about it. What kind of guy, without a drug or alcohol problem looks this way? For example, I celebrate the independence of Papua New Guinea every day and swallow drug baloons, but my look is full of expression.I wanna poke out your fucking eyes with my dick, stupid fuck. To be honest, I have nothing against these monkeys, but gentlemen, please, control your self, goddammit! Okay, let's not talk about horse dung, because look, how many good topics are on the agenda. Not so long ago, defined a prominent upward trend -  to poison all sorts of dudes with nuclear powder, in order to blame Russia and tsar Putin personally for all troubles. Know that in Russia they poison only with vodka that is what bears do it, not special services. It is first. And secondly, damn, for example, in England stores are just selling non quality yogurt, which are smuggled from Romania and people just eat this yogurt and get poisoned like cockroaches and different special services say, that this is some kind of mysterious nuclear powder. I like to drink champagne from my basset hound ass, I also like to throw darts in the portrait of Obama's ugly mug. By the way, I can offer you something that you cannot refuse - to play the game, the rules are here. I advise you to turn off porn movies with animals before this and put on a protective helmet, good luck.

The World is changing, wars are passing, aborigines are born, aborigines are dying, have you ever gone to a solarium? This topic is close to me, as I worked as an administrator in the Solarium, as well as an intimate assistant of hairdresser somewhere for two weeks. The hairdresser was an old man, about 70 years old and bunch of stinking men came to him to make a hair. Old hairdresser cut customer's feet,vegetation near their genitals and around ass. One day a certain eccentric came to the salon, introduced himself as Steven Seagal and asked to cut his hair in the area of his dick and in the same area he wanted to make a pattern in the form of the face of Bill Clinton. "Any whims for your money" said the hairdresser and began to lick own mouth. An old pervert asked me to put a gag in the client's mouth (the tank shall be closed in such a way that no leakage of gas occurs) and hold his hands so that our client wouldn't twitch and also took a dildo and then, radical pervert jumped out the window. I stayed alone with the client and was a little confused, I suggested Steven to sunbathe in the solarium, he did not refuse and lay down in it. After a while I ran a super high fever due to drug breaking. I did not have a methamphetamine with me and I began to rummage in the pockets of the client's pants, which was sunbathing, to find some pills. In the pockets I found anal beads and a laxative and then I remembered that this day is the anniversary of the death of my hamster and I decided to go to the cemetery and lay flowers on the grave. Two hours later, I reached the cemetery and saw a funeral procession, it turns out that some kind of an old conductor died and was decided to bury him. I saw how the coffin with the dead was taken out of the hearse and carried somewhere, but all of a sudden people who wore black clothes and were carrying a coffin have droped it and cadaver have rolled out while still holding his old saxophone in his dead hands. I was so scared that I ran away. When I came home, I remembered that the client is still sunbathing in the solarium, if you know what happened to him write in the comments. I no longer worked in this beauty salon. I just don't have any luck with normal work, but money must be earned and I decided to go for the trick. I asked my neighbor to shoot me in the knee and after that the state would start paying me a disability allowance. This idea seemed grandiose to me, but unfortunately the neighbor did not have a gun, because he was a dirty and old pervert, the curator of local bums. He gave them a creepy task to shit in a bags and throw them off the bridge to the driving cars. The neighbor also had a wife - a goat from a barn, and a lot of children - inflatable dolls of Asian children. If you know how to save these children - write in the comments. Did I tell you that I live on an old submarine? Yes it's true. I tell this to psychiatrists at the medical board, to be recognized as insane and the state might start to pay me allowance. What the fuck, do you think I'm nutty? Of course, I live in an ordinary wooden house, just feel like on a submarine and I'm headed on a bearing at a speed of 10 knots. I like to piss in a bucket, then pour a contents onto the floor and announce the alarm on the entire submarine. I have to take a mop and polish the floor to a shine, then I put on the welder's glasses and try to repel the attack of the Indians, who are all up in line to get on my submarine, they keep popping like fleas. Did I tell you that I'm an honorary zoologist? Not so long ago, I was driving my van and accidentally squished a pigeon like he was a pile of turd, which was glued to the asphalt, and I shoveled up the pieces, I studied them, then I placed them at the entrance to McDonald's and ran away. Did I tell you that I am a distinguished biologist and developer of GMO products? I take a tomato seed and put it into my drawers, it's dry and warm there. I take a rake and start to plow the garden in my drawers and do it while my dick erect. I also want to put an egg into my drawers to hold it a little bit there to make a chicken, it's dry and warm there. And remember, the result is everything! Write in the comments what you think about GMO products. The Japanese are very smart people, because they eat a lot of fish. I also love fish, but I don’t eat it, but watch as it blows bubbles underwater, also, like a farting mammoth with alzheimer's syndrome. Some Japanese shit soap bubbles too. Sorry, please, that I write such nonsense. Okay, what's on our agenda?

Not so long ago, I rested in a bar and saw something interesting, I don’t know whether to tell you or not. I'm still scared and I always turn around to find out if I'm under surveillance right now. At the bar, the dude, who was a local bartender turned out to be a marmon, which took a smoked chicken, poured alcohol into its back hole and shook it to make a cocktail. Probably, in the inside of smoked chicken stuck headset Google Glass, which filmed everything that happens on video and it was all broadcast live in the press center of the White House.A moment later, the bartender took off his hat, poured alcohol and pissed inside, then he immediately put the hat back on his head. I wanted to ask this motherfucker for a cocktail recipe, that he was masterfully making in his hat, but I got scared, puked twice on the pool table and ran away. What have you done good there lately? For example, I read an encyclopedia about the time of Columbus and learned that in those old days there were many treasures hidden. I always thought that Columbus is a dump truck brand, well, never mind.So, I went to the local library to read the encyclopedia where Columbus had buried his treasures in order to try and dig out his chest. Unfortunately, while I was going , the library was burned to the ground, since some group of rastas tore pages from the books in order to wrap an excellent joint for themselves and set the fire inside. I peed on the ashes and remembered that I have a shovel, as well I remembered that little groups of bums have a great antiques things, that have been found for many years arrive at the dump. I took a shovel from the house and went to look for a bum to follow him in stealh mode. In a city park, I saw a bum lying on a bench, he was like a big and stinking piece of shit, even flies were swarming around him, but weren't able to land and when some brave fly tried, it's intentions corroded to the point, when it fell down breathless. I was very impatient to wash his butt and to dig up antique things and I decided to dig at a bench where the bum lay. I started digging and immediately dug up used Huggies diapers, the urge to find something valuable overwhelmed me, the excitement was in me. In a moment I dug a sock in which a dildo was wrapped, I was in a passion and I started to dig further. After an hour of digging, I found a German soldier's helmet from the World War II and another used Huggies diaper. I lost hope to find antique things and decided to teach a lesson to the impudent bum. I took off his trausers, put it on my head and went to the synagogue to pray. Maybe there are antique things in the synagogue and it is worth digging there? If you know something, please write in the comments. In fact, I try to masturbate less and give myself to faith in God, I hope that All Mighty will hear my prayers and help me. Donate me please a little money for food and for the payment of the account on Pornhub. No, but text me if you find my crack pipe. Did you know that I am a tough fighter with overweight? I'm an innovator in this case and I patented my methods in Silicon Valley, so don't fucking lie that you've known this method for a long time. I had a neighbor, he weighed two centners, just a huge bag of shit and he consulted with me how to lose weight. I advised him to fill his mouth with stones and jump into the river and do so twice a day, poor old wobbly head. He filled his mouth with stones and jumped into the river, but for some reason did not come out of the water. I had throw a brick in that presize spot he have jumped, in just to make sure and then I went home to sleep. Year later, first thing that I saw, which come out of the water was that fat loser's trausers with brown stains on it. I put his trausers on my head and went to the synagogue to pray. Once when I was walking in a city park, I was very impatient to shit and hid in the bushes. Fuck, I swear I prayed that there were no constipation and them were no. Damn, I lost my mind and forgot to tell you something important. Oh, I remembered. Your humble servant hid in the bushes, but was discovered by the security forces and beaten with their rifle buts. For the violation of law and order, I spent a day in prison with some homeless person, a homeless dude which had real urine stains on his pants. I took his pants by force and put them on my head, they let me out of the detention center and I went to the synagogue to pray. Did you know that a man who doesn't have a hand can't be arrested? It is not possible. You just can't handcuff him. Understand the thought? Please spread this thesis and mention my name. These are the pink crocodiles for today.

Thank you my dear readers for coming with me through all the serious ones, I love you and please answer me with love too. Soon! Soon you will be able to see something great and learn a lot about your humble servant.

Thank you for attention, follow up the news!